restless ease, a poem

thinking

Prologue: I am one, from my time in this world as far back as I can reckon unto this very day, given to untempered and unfettered swings of mood from highest jollity and raucous laughter to nadir-depths of sadness, deep discordant sighs my only song; the shift, sometimes sudden, spurred by life’s griefs, yes, mine own, yet largely those of others, some whom I know, most I do not, for I, provoked, I believe, by the Spirit, embrace – not always willingly, but nonetheless unavoidably – creation’s pain, which clings irremovably to my heart’s hands. As a follower of Jesus, I pray, I trust that in his life and ministry, death and resurrection, he hath broken – and hath made possible the bearing of – the curse of care. In that faith, amid another, the latest of these anguished spells, during the small hours of this morn, the following words were given to me…

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In my days, a weighted, unbreakable chain of restless ease

decrying the world’s ceaseless woe,

advancing, retreating to sleepless nights of supplication endless

my mind and heart, soul and spirit tossing hither, then yon,

I lean on the love of Jesus,

the One who lived and died for us

forsaking safety from the storms of human sin

seeking alway to enter in

our very blood and breath,

our pain of flesh,

our experience of life to share;

His heart to care,

His body to bear

the cross of our indignities

that One dare die to set us free.

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4 thoughts on “restless ease, a poem

  1. Out of suffering and pain come the greatest blessings. Thank you for sharing – raw, unfiltered, personal yet feelings no doubt shared by many others. You my dear are an immense blessing and I’m honored to call you friend. This is beautiful 😊

    Liked by 1 person

    • Karen, for more time than I care to recall, yet, in my remembrance, I acknowledge that suffering and pain oft led me to bitterness, abiding and abundant. Then when, in the course of my living, I took the path of deepening faith (though, yes, in league with my doubts), I found comfort (that is, com-fortis, God coming to me again and again through the Spirit to strengthen me). For this, even amid my pain, I am grateful.

      Love and peace,
      Paul

      Like

  2. Thank you for this beautiful poem Paul! Don’t know where I’d be without the love of Jesus these last few months and days. I wrote this in the middle of the night about eight months ago to help me get through this past year…”when the pain is too much for me to continue to grieve, Jesus is always there to relieve…..I leave it blank for whatever I need relief from at that time. It’s so helpful for me to repeat this over and over.

    But the poem you’ve shared here goes so much deeper and reminds us all of how much Jesus has done for us!

    Sending Love to you and Pontheolla!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Love you, dear sister

      What you express about your experience of reliance on Jesus to aid you in moments of deepest grief and need capture my faith-journey. So often (always?) I am aware of my lack in my capacity to care for others and, indeed, myself. I have learned to lean on the One I seek to follow, even when bearing or burdened by my doubts, trusting that Jesus will lift me up. And he does.

      Again, much love

      Like

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