O God, Thy kingdom come?

O’er these past few days – provoked, perhaps in equal parts, by my slower-than-I’d-like recovery from surgery, the seasonally mood-affecting, melancholia-inducing dreary winter skies, and my quintessential and abiding inner psycho-shadow world of pessimism – I’ve been dwelling a lot on the pain and sorrow of this world.

Early this morning, I had a dream or perhaps a semi-conscious alternate-vision that, upon fully awakening, continued to speak to me in the following meditation on Luke 14.12-14.

I turn away from the world;

my eyes tired,

my vision teared

by the avarice,

malice

and all-too consequent sadness

I see.

 

Adrift on the rhythmic pulsing of my yet hopeful heart,

I fantasize,

visualize

a far off place…

 

There!

 

Where

the poor & bloated-bellied hungry,

who e’er are the last and least,

at banquet tables feast;

and this world’s finest and first

make haste

to offer service,

treating them

as royalty,

at their feet, genuflecting, calling them,

“Your majesties!”;

who, though alway too humble by half,

unwilling to suffer the obeisance of eternal equals,

bid their servants join them at table…

 

Where

the broken-bodied gambol through verdurous fields;

their disabilities

yielding to everlasting energies…

 

Where

the blind stare unblinking

admiring

their reflections

sans all imperfection;

their mirrored smiles confirmation

of their long-harbored, secret conviction

that they’d like the way they looked

if e’er they, as now without end, could see.

 

But here

in this world, there –

save for bright-hued visions

of imagination,

the hopeful phantasms of my soul’s desperation –

remains a far off (inaccessible?) destination;

perhaps no terminus at all, for one can’t get there

from here.

 

Then I think, no, I was, I am blessedly wrong,

for there

is ne’er

far off, but alway near,

and truly appears,

however partially,

here

whene’er

I or anyone acts,

however imperfectly,

on faith

in God that Thy kingdom come, Thy will be done

on earth.

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2 thoughts on “O God, Thy kingdom come?

  1. Great meditation Paul!! I’ve always loved that passage in Luke because serving others less fortunate than myself speaks to me. I’d never expect to be paid for it either.

    The meditation is powerful!! Even if we are not feeling our best, as you described in the meditation, we can STILL realize that thy Kingdom come, Thy will be done on earth exists!! We just have to have faith. Thanks for continuing to have such faith in spite of all the craziness in the world today!!

    Gives me hope! I hope you feel like yourself again soon!! Still praying for your healing!

    Liked by 1 person

    • Loretta, as I think afresh about this (as am wont to do about any subject or issue and at any time!), it occurs to me that perhaps it is precisely when I feel my lowest, when the horizons are dimmest (now, literally, for me in winter), and the shadows of my inner world loom darkest that I can behold more clearly and readily the light of hope. In some reasonable way this makes sense to me. For hope is the anticipation, even expectation that what is not yet can and will be, which burns brightest when all ’round is darkest. (In this realization, I suppose and suspect if all or most was well in my life and world and sense of myself and things, I might not cling so mightily to hope. In some arrogant sense, in the case of the best of circumstances, I may not be aware of my desire or need to hope and to act on that hope!)

      Liked by 1 person

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